Thursday, April 4, 2013

Jack Huntley


Today I was shocked to receive a letter from the mayor of Pale Forest, Jack Huntley.  What's more, it appears to be handwritten!  I've never so much as met the man in person, so direct correspondence was not something I expected.  In fact, I haven't even seen him around town since that day at the mill.

While I'm certain he'd frown upon me doing so, I've decided to transcribe it here for you all to read.
It's come to my attention that you're still going on about the town and how "weird" everything is here.  I've decided to write you and ask you to please stop.
Before you dismiss this letter, though, hear me out.  I know you've got readers and all on that blog of yours, but, honestly, you're not doing anyone any favors by spreading a bunch of silly rumors-- and that includes the more impressionable people who might actually be buying what you're selling!
As I'm sure you know, Pale Forest is a small town with folks who value their privacy.  This whole business of ghost stories and what not might be entertaining to children, but when you start including real people in them, maybe it's time to stop and think about who it is you're hurting.  You grew up here, Jonas, so you of all people should have respect for the fine people of this town and their wishes.  As mayor, I know I do.
But look, this letter isn't just to scold you or anything.  Hell, I've known your family for years now; your father was a great guy.  In fact, my real wish is for the Clark family name regain its place here in Pale Forest.  To help that happen, I've spoken to the fine people at the mill and you'll be happy to know we've cleared up that whole "trespassing" issue so you won't be prosecuted.  But don't thank me or anything; just think of it as an investment in what I think can still be a very bright future here.  Of course, even as mayor, I can't pull strings forever, so I hope you see this as the opportunity it really is.
The bottom line, Jonas, is Pale Forest is a great place to live and we're mighty proud of it.  I know it must have seemed cool to write those stories at the time, but hopefully by now you're realizing just how much you have to lose.
Let me know if I can help in any way,
--Jack Huntley

So, obviously, Huntley has taken notice of the blog.  I'd suspected as much several times, but now it's painfully clear he'd rather it not exist at all.  He's also not afraid to use some rather thinly veiled threats to get his point across, either.  Still, I can't say I'm not grateful he wiped the trespassing issue from the books.

Also, I'd like to point out that bit about my family is complete rubbish.  If, on the of chance, Huntley even knew my father, I'm quite certain he'd have treated him with the same disdain he shows all outsiders.  Of course, I'm immensely proud to say I wasn't born here, so I don't care if it causes Huntley to look down his nose at my family.

What do you think the letter means, believers?  Should I be worried?  Let me know.

Until next time...